The Perplexing Chaperone


Carrot pickles. Not a photographer.

School dance night. Bigfoot + spouse out w. friend for shrubs and carrot pickles. Check Share. BG 175-ish. All’s well. Isn’t this so great that we can do this?! (Clink!)

Meanwhile…@dance, in snack line. This conversation.

Unknown adult/chaperone: What’s your blood glucose?

BUBS: (Checks Dexcom. No guile.) It’s 191.

UAC: That’s too high.

BUBS: (Buying Halloween-size candy bars.) It’s okay. I already took insulin.

UAC: You shouldn’t eat that.

BUBS: Sorry, I have to eat it because I already took insulin.

UAC: You still shouldn’t eat that. It has too much sugar.

Eats candy. Dance, carry on, etc. Call for ride home. (79 mg/dL, FWIW.) Reports dance fun, except for chaperone.

Bigfoot (in head only) = Chaperone, don’t butt in! Let him be at a dance! If he listened to your advice he would have passed out in front of all of his classmates! Geeeeeze! Leave him alone!

But what if slumped over, no friend nearby. Would want chaperone investigate, maybe encourage juice.

What if seizure. Would want chaperone call ambulance.

Also what if cut on leg? Want band-aid. Gah.

Try think: what possible say, instructive/not dickish? How prevent future chaperone interfere/endanger? Realize: can’t predict thoughts of/control actions of chaperone. Out in public, randos likely interfere. Can’t prevent. Randos everywhere.

Only course = prepare child for randos.

Told Bubs, stranger asks BG, possible responses:

  • I’m sorry. I don’t know you, and that’s personal.
  • I’m fine, and I have everything I need.
  • I think it would be impolite to discuss that here.
  • If I need help, maybe I could ask you for it someday, once I know who you are.
  • ((crickets))







  1. Reyna · January 30, 2016

    I love the “impolite” response idea. You guys are awesome.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Sara · January 31, 2016

    I probably have used all those responses but my favorite approach is to ask them their weight. If they are willing to share that bit of personal information, I’ll share my BG. (I’ve only had to tell my BG in response one time)

    Liked by 4 people

  3. Lucia Maya · January 31, 2016

    I love your unspoken thoughts, and your practical ideas are great!

    I rarely get unsolicited advice but today had a stranger ask if I “wanted to get rid of it” after being told my cgm was because I have type 1 diabetes…it was a good opportunity to educate, but wouldn’t be fun if I had to do it more than once every 5 years!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. skchrisman · February 1, 2016

    I’d be tempted to advise him to give the chaperone his phone, saying, “Here, why don’t you just call my mother and let her tell you how much I’ve got this?” Giggle Giggle. Just imagine it.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Scott E · February 1, 2016

    I typically default to response #3. I give vague answers like “I’m fine” or “it’s OK”. Something that can’t elicit some sort of direction because I haven’t given any info.

    If someone suggests that they’re trying to help (and I suggest you give similar instructions to future chaperones) then I simply say that if I need their help, they’ll know it. As long as I’m standing on my own feet, coherent, and not throwing up all over the place, I can take care of myself.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. type1tot · February 3, 2016

    Ohhh so tough! Good intentions (yeah, that could have come in handy in other circumstances) but too pushy here with a kid who’s obviously got it under control…. Yeah, he needs a “safe word” type response that politely says F off i’m in control, but thank you for your concern, and also maybe read up a bit more on this stuff before you double down on your advice. So did he kiss anyone?????


Please say things:

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s