28 x 30

Children grow. This week, the slender twelve-year-old here could not button any of his pants, and in terms of getting dressed, we were down to two pairs of too-short sweatpants and some shorts.

So this week, I’ve spent hunks of each day seeking, purchasing, goading a person to try on, and then returning boys’ pants. I purchased many styles and shapes of size 14 pants and jeans. None fit. Size 14 for a twelve year old. (Are they now making boys’ sizes with an inverted women’s skew? Skewed to make the boy feel bigger than he is?) Crew Cuts told me maybe, but no. And that there is no such thing as a sixteen. Gap Kids told me there are sixteens and eighteens online, but these are, generally speaking, for the husky.

The Gap Kids saleswoman asked me, “Has he tried our men’s pants?”

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Man pants x2

BOOM. My baby is a man. Man-sized, anyway. A tiny man. And he fits perfectly into “skinny” cut man pants, size 28 x 30.

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Smooth.

I took this as a clue to not say things to strangers about him, personally, any more. Things like why fake out (saying 122 mg/dL, when you were clearly 300+) the school nurse (you adore her!) and bolus for lunch without testing (and 122 is such a fake number), and not even correcting for the high Dexcom was displaying, which you would have known without even testing and I mean it takes zero effort and WTH? And how Dad called me (while I was in J. Crew, looking for pants!) to ask me if I’d noticed on the Share that you’d been 300+ for a while and should we call or text you to make sure you’d corrected or at least noticed, and we agreed it would be more damaging to you to have parents who ask you diabetes questions all day than to have your capillaries scritched up from extra glucose for a few hours. But then I texted you anyway, because I think you and I had agreed I’d do that or you’d text me whenever you noticed and corrected a super-high and if you didn’t contact me, that meant you hadn’t noticed…and you said, and I said, and you said…anyway, I’m going to keep all of that to myself, Man Pants.

To recover from all of the growing and lying, I made myself breakfast. I would like to remember this breakfast, so I’m putting notes here. This would be good with mushrooms or spinach or roasted squash or any kind of bits of leftover vegetables you (I) have in the future.

Baked Eggs With Whatever Looks Good

FullSizeRenderOven 400F. Butter four 1-cup ramekins. Beat five eggs with 1/3 cup whole milk, a pinch of salt, and a few grinds of pepper. Take one leftover strip of already-cooked bacon and chop it up. Heat it in a pan and cook a minced shallot in it. (Or cook a shallot in butter or olive oil.) Add two small heaps of chopped greens or whatever vegetable you like. Cook until wilted. Divide the cooked baco-veg among the ramekins, about 1/4 cup per ramekin. Sprinkle grated cheddar cheese on top. Ladle the egg mixture over the top. Sprinkle with a tiny bit more cheese. Bake for 15 minutes, or until set and beginning to turn golden brown. I used wide, shallow ramekins. Deeper ones would have to bake longer. Serve on top of raw greens. Seems like it would serve four, but I ate two. For carbs, I’m calling these 4g each.

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You actually used these paper ramekins, and they were perfect and there are more in the tin where you keep the muffin papers.

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14 responses to “28 x 30

  1. Polina

    Man on man… V is turning 11 in April. You are writing about our fast-approaching future. I am nervous. No, I am not. I am scared shitless. I should take a page out of your book and take breakfast up a notch. I already make sure we never ever run out of wine.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I didn’t really think my person would be “the type” to lie about this kind of thing, because he’s not really tough or cool or secretive about having diabetes or anything. Oh well.

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  2. Man!!!! Sniff sniff yay!!! Love your fancy breakfast…maybe someday I will get my act together! Amazing!

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  3. Wow, man sized pants on a 12 year old! I don’t know why Gap can’t keep 16’s in the store. That’s what my son gets and he’s definitely not husky. Perhaps it is time to look at the man pants…

    As for the question to intervene or not to intervene — that is a tough one that we are now faced with. Not following Dex numbers was bliss, except for those rare times when it wasn’t. We received the G5 just before Xmas and quickly learned that phones are necessary at this point. That receiver just doesn’t reach our bedroom at night anymore. Anyway, guidelines are evolving — as in there are none. Our 15 year old is not eager to get our real-time feedback. And, as long as he’s not in danger, we’re refraining. Looking forward to the upcoming Endo appt where the patterns that we can COMPLETELY explain can be handled between them (with us present). Ah, parenting teens…

    So making a delicious breakfast sounds like a great choice. Bravo! 🙂

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    • Regarding the “husky”, now I think maybe it was a sales technique to get me out of kids and into men’s, so I wouldn’t leave empty-handed? It makes no sense to go from silly twelve-year-old to MAN.

      : )

      Liked by 1 person

      • Kid sizes have better prices! 🙂 We’re able to find 16’s at Old Navy. Now if I could just find Slim, big-booty jeans/pants for my youngest. I’m getting ready to hire a tailor…

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  4. Larry Here

    Timely post. Though ours is a girl, and only just 8. We have recently been experiencing some anger and non-compliance for the first time in our 6 years of this crap. Global shift has started. Karen’s mention of guidelines/none already seems relevant. Enough rage is being experienced that we are gonna get some pro help very soon. Pants have nothing to do with our situation, other than the fact that our girl’s ankles certainly DO seem to be getting longer…

    Breakfast was peaceful this morning, even though we all almost didn’t make it through the war last night. The fun continues. Thanks for your post.

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  5. Jennifer

    Doing the VERY same thing this week for my 12 year old skinny growing ever taller boy – where to find waist 27-30 pants? Ordered in many pairs will be goading to try – 16 slims in Levis – hadn’t thought to move to MENS….gulp. AND doing the same thing with the texting and the “yeah I got it” and the woah where didthe 250 come from because you “didn’t eat the rescue Jelly Belly sports beans” just cause… Sometimes I think we live in a parallel universe albeit me in a warmer climate😊I enjoy your blog.

    Like

  6. Leftover bacon? What on earth is that?? 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’m with Karen! I sympathize with the boys’ pants issues. I have two sons and it wasn’t easy at all (years ago). But the thought that stayed in my head was – leftover bacon? And – did you hide the bacon from the son?

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  8. skchrisman

    You are on the road looking at a highway rest stop map having left the state of “Things are Terrific” and inside the border of the state of “Teen”. You stare at the star that says You Are Here. And your star is too far away from the state of “Things are Good”. Realizing your journey is long your shoulders lower from the weight. The good thing is, we live in the same state with a lot of other nice people, making eggs and working on acceptance. Your texts look good. Look exactly like ours. Keep those shoulders up, Momma.

    Liked by 1 person

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