Clean it Out


Diabetes Blog Week, Day 3. Clean it out.

I’d like to clean-scrub-exfoliate-and swab with a cotton ball, dripping in Clinique Toner #2 my mind of the petty rage items I can’t seem to release:

  • My spouse calls ANY kind of memory aid a mnemonic. Example: can I put the vacuum away or did you leave it out as a mnemonic? Or, when I ask if he knows the age of a vial of insulin I find at the foot of the bed that has an inch of decorative paper tape stuck to it, but no date, and I want to know if I should chuck it or use it, he’ll say the paper tape is a mnemonic. Even so, the meaning of the tape and age of the vial remain mysteries.
  • Happy anniversary.

    Happy anniversary.

    WTH teachers not following our shiny-new 504 plan? As in, the DAY AFTER we met and agreed you would let me know when you’re going to use food in class so I can provide a GF version, you GIVE HIM PRETZELS? Oh my god. It’s pretzels. And of course he knows to not eat them and–err—there’s actually no immediate DANGER, but…the whole point is…this could not be pettier even with the addition of kazoos and hats with those twirly-bird things on top. I can’t fall asleep at night because pretzels to me indicate a general lack of care for ALL OF THE THINGS.

  • This is one of the most beautiful weeks of the year, in terms of weather. I’ve noticed this because it is Mother’s Day-Wedding Anniversary-Birthday Week. You walk the dog and giggly pink petals swirl all around you on a gentle breeze and all that jazz. So there is a lot of pressure to be happy. I hate it. People warned me I should not get married so close to my birthday. They were right. But it’s not like that phenomenon of having a birthday on December 26th, where you feel overlooked and pouty because you’re not getting enough of a spotlight. My problem is the wave after wave of curious happiness-monitors: What did you do for Mother’s Day? (I went to TrialNet) followed by What did you do for your anniversary? (responded to emails from teachers about why they aren’t following the fucking 504) followed by What did you do for your birthday? (this year the answer will surely be: read dreamy blog posts about what people eat.) My rational brain knows no one cares that I didn’t go skydiving with Bono for these occasions. I just resent having to think about it or feeling like I have to doll up my…forget it.
  • I remain pissed, although this hasn’t happened for YEARS, at the T2 people in our lives who have weaned themselves off insulin and suggest we try to do the same. Or those who have pre-diabetes, even though they like, totally don’t deserve it, all they eat is health food, and then shrug as they tuck into a box of Triscuits and a bag of Craisins.
  • I can’t even deal with celiac disease people who don’t have T1d and their enthusiasm for Udi’s cinnamon buns and Aldi’s new cheesecake quartet. (I’m sure both are very tasty.)
  • I don’t like when people list the things they hate. I love it. If you don’t have anything nice to say, sit by me. Better yet, put a petty concern in the comments! We know it is not good for us but it is at times irresistible. Like icy Diet Cokes! Dwelling in negativity can be delicious.

May I be happy. May you be happy. May all beings be happy.

Read more clean it out.

Advertisements

37 responses to “Clean it Out

  1. Wendy and I both tried to bolus for the Udi’s cinnamon buns. There is something wrong with the carb counts. Her daughter and I both ended up epically low after on multiple tries. They aren’t even that good. So not worth it!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. lifeont1

    I hate when people put too much mayonnaise on a sandwich. It makes me GAG.

    Like

  3. I hate it when I am behind someone in 7-11 and all I want to buy is a coffee or maybe even a pack of gum and they are redeeming 47 scratch-off tickets…inconvenience store…..

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I hate it when I am in line at the 7-11 and want to buy just a coffee or maybe even a pack of gum and I am behind someone redeeming 47 scratch-off tickets..inconvenience store

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Pam

    I’m happier now than I was a few minutes ago. It makes me happy to know I’m not alone in my laundry list of petty(?) concerns. And happy to read yours expressed so amusingly. Thank you!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Kay T

    Does our hate list need to be alphabetically or categorically sorted? Like Pam, this post made me feel a lot better.

    Like

  7. I hate people who don’t put away grocery carts. I’ve been grocery shopping with three tiny devils 5 and under, in the rain, and I can still put my cart away. You can too. Learn about strategic parking (like next to the cart corral). And leaving your cart in an actual parking space makes you a special breed of ass.

    And breathe.

    Like

    • I do sometimes leave my cart. This behavior is wrong and a relic of an era when I was taught this was a good way to create jobs. Also leaving trash (neatly) on the floor of a movie theater.

      Like

  8. I really hope you emailed the teachers and used your exact language that you did here. “Why aren’t you following the fucking 504?”

    I hate it when people think that because fruit has sugar, I should not eat it. I LOVE FRUIT. GIVE ME ALL THE FRUIT! (and the insulin)

    Like

  9. I can pretend I don’t need mnemonics because I set alarms in my calendar so I don’t forget important things….

    Like

    • Are you pulling my leg? I thought all good people only used mnemonic to mean a CATCHY thing that aids memory, like Oh Oh Oh To Touch a Fat Ass Makes (Bleep) Shiver…etc. for the cranial nerves.

      I also HATE admitting I am WRONG about WORDS.

      Like

    • I had to reread what Laddie wrote because I knew she couldn’t have been wrong. Sorry about that to all involved.

      Just remember: Large dog never meows. LDNM or Laddie Doesn’t Need Mnemonics.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I don’t know how anybody can stand Diet Pepsi,because Ewww. But then I think maybe most PWD people prefer that over Diet Coke and maybe I’m the strange one. So I will still sit and talk with you,even if you are drinking it. Although I will wish said person knew about the superiority of Diet Coke.

    Like

  11. Mary Margaret

    I spent the last two hours on phone calls dealing with filling prescriptions and asking insurance questions. On July 1st they’re going to limit the amount of insulin in a prescription like most companies do test strips. But they don’t know what the limit will be until 7/1 so I can’t get the prior authorization going until 7/1 and I’ve got company that week so I won’t even do it then. Who limits the insulin they will provide to a T1? Pah.

    And I was on for 40 minutes even trying to get my test strips rx filled, they turned it over to a supervisor and will call me tomorrow (hah) with the resolution, even though the prior authorization is in the system and the rx is for half the number they authorized.

    At 1 am last night the insulin pump battery failed. I changed the battery two days ago, what is it doing failing in the middle of the night?

    Just try to show me a pretzel. I’ll kick whoever it is.

    And for Mother’s Day I got a hug. It was a terrific present. Not to rain happiness on the parade. This morning I got two more hugs.

    Like

  12. Kelli

    5 yr old does not have celiac, but does have type 1. At this house, cereal and pretzels are of the devil. No matter what I do he goes high, high, high…for hours after. Love, love love your blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I’m going to take that “sit by me” line, that is a good one. I love to complain. 😉

    My school doesn’t do 504s, we just have a form to fill out about dietary restrictions, which everyone then ignores. A teacher fed my kid just yesterday and when I asked him why he didn’t say no (he knows better) he said she insisted that it was “healthy” and everyone had to try.

    Like

  14. skchrisman

    I hate that I picked up my puppy today at the crematorium, but love that our ginger-haired friend was at my side sharing in my disbelief.

    I hate not being able to find anyone on this planet who is GF, not Celiacs, but also not egg/dairy/potato/soy/yeast/normie calorie. Where are you people? Actually, I hate a lot of things surrounding food.

    I hate being anywhere with a diet coke from McDonald’s, getting judge-y looks from people who actually think I bought FOOD at that place.

    I hate that people don’t believe I like to be alone to recharge, and at home I am very quiet.

    I hate cancer.

    I hate urging people, with much enthusiasm, to go ahead and do the 504 only to hear the administration is fucking it all up. I want to call them and tell them they are making me look bad.

    Like

  15. Polina

    I hate it… NO, I fucking hate it when people offer unsolicited advice. Especially when it’s unsolicited advice about diabetes. I also fucking hate it when people assume we are on a gluten-free fad bandwagon. And last but not least, I hate it when people proclaim that gluten and/or sugar are the root of all evil.

    OK, exhale. I feel better now. 🙂

    Like

  16. I think this might very well be one of my favourite posts to the point that I’m going to read it again.. hold on a sec…
    Yeah.. that’s right. I’m going to post a blog about all the things I hate and for the first time ever i’m not going to feel guilty about it.

    This is the best.

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Pingback: All the Links | inDpendence

  18. love this – good to express hate sometimes, and better with humor!

    Like

Please say things:

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Bigfoot say other thing

%d bloggers like this: