So Intense

Remember Neurotic City brilliant nail diabetes dx on head (2009!) w. German language analogy? As learn more/more about D, vorsprung durch technik seem even more accurate.

Last night couldn’t sleep. Think about why I have diabetes (present simple) sound so morose vs. I’ve got diabetes (present perfect) more cheerful/breezy. Why I’ve got diabetes sound tra-la-la move on, next topic but I have diabetes sound like [Law & Order noise]: prepare discuss some bad thing. Not really answer insomniac question, but sans diabetes, perhaps life (in Ingles) not require so many verb tenses?

Present simple: We prebolus for breakfast.

Present continuous: The pump is infusing basal insulin at a rate of 0.35 units per hour.

Present perfect: Why yes, I have read about Joel Fuhrman’s cure for my son’s diabetes.

Present perfect continuous: We have been avoiding this site change for three hours.

Future conditional: I will bolus for these potato chips if the water is too cold for boogie boarding.

Future perfect: He will have tested twelve times by the end of the day.

Future perfect continuous: We will have been using this sensor for nineteen days at the end of this week.

Future continuous: I will be changing the infusion set in the back seat of the car when we get to Target.

Future unreal conditional: If there were a gluten antidote, I would make baguettes.

Past continuous: We were using Inset 30s before the Contact-Detach kind arrived.

Past perfect continuous: I had been listening to Edgepark’s “on hold” soundtrack for twenty minutes when the announcement about colostomy lubricant finally began.

Pluperfect: He had eaten three glucose tabs when the double down arrows appeared.

Simple past: The CVS pharmacy technician gave me a receipt ten feet long.

 Simple future: I will watch Orange is the New Black with the Dexcom right by my head, in case I doze.

 

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9 responses to “So Intense

  1. I hate and love you at the same time, for being so brilliant while giving me flashbacks of my advanced Intensive German course and Herr Fischkopf (yes, that was really his name… Poor guy.)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Re present-perfect (?): The beginning of this post reminds me of the day at diabetes camp when a bunch of us marched across the campus cheerfully chanting “We’ve got diabetes … and we’re not sharing!” as if we were privileged to have found a sunken treasure.

    Re colostomy-lubricant: If I decide not to switch to Dexcom, this message-on-hold will be the reason why.

    Hysterical!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I know someone who memorized a whole paragraph/super long sentence that had an example of all 14/13/16? tense types in it. He wasn’t even a native speaker of English. I made a fool of myself minutes before by saying I guess we have 3 tenses in English: past, present, and future. Hah!

    Like

  4. Ben

    CVS+10 foot long receipt! So true! (Never any coupons you want either. Always, buy three deodorant get one free! How much deodorant do they think I need???!?!?! )

    Liked by 1 person

  5. word nerd! love it! and thanks for the shouty-outy!

    Like

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