The Fattening

You're getting fatter.

Look into my eyes. You’re getting fatter.

Celiac 6? 9? month follow up visit.

Gastroenterologist many questions:

How are you adjusting to the gluten free diet? (Fine.) Are you finding foods you like to eat? (Yup. I guess so.) Any summer plans? (Mmmhmm.) Any stomach pain? (Nope.) Does this hurt at all? (Palpates abdominal cavity.) (No.)

Appointment ends with pronouncement: You’re doing great!


Grains, nuts, fats, insulin—>grow now please.

However, child taller & gain <1 lb. (< less than. Less than one pound.) Well, he’s definitely moving in the right direction!

Plan = redouble fattening effort. Via snacks.

Almond Joy Bars

adapted from Oh She Glows

Line a 9 x 9″ pan with parchment. In a giant bowl, combine 1.5c gluten free oats + 1c gluten free rice crispies + 1/2c slivered almonds + 1/3c shredded coconut + 3T chia seeds + 1/2tsp. salt. In a small pot, melt together 2/3c Justin’s Vanilla Almond butter1T coconut nectar + 2T coconut oil. Add the melteds to the giant bowl and mix well. Heap this luscious combo into the prepared pan. Scatter 2T dark chocolate chunks on top of the heap. Use a 2nd piece of parchment to press the mixture very firmly into the pan. Freeze for 30 minutes or more. Slice into 14 granola bar-looking rectangles. Wrap each bar in waxed paper. Store in freezer. Eat. Be nourished. Get fatter.

I called these 18g CHO each. He ate two with a glass of cow milk, spikelessly.


Next time use a ruler for handsomer slicing.




  1. Jennifer · June 4, 2014

    Those sound AWESOME. I want to make them so much!!! (Although, mine will not technically the same as no celiac = regular oats and stuff).

    Where do I find coconut nectar/what does it look like? And I have never seen the vanilla almond butter. Will have to investigate that.


    • Katy · June 4, 2014

      Coconut nectar is near the honey/agave at our Whole Foods. It is supposed to have a lower glycemic index than the other sticky things on that shelf. You could def use honey instead.

      The vanilla almond butter is just what I had on hand—plain almond butter and more sweetener is what’s in the real recipe.

      I was imagining making this with chocolate hazelnut butter. Mmm. It seems like a good recipe for using things up/cramming in calories.


  2. Karen · June 5, 2014

    Oh my goodness, if only I wasn’t trying to move in the opposite direction re: weight.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Katy · June 5, 2014

      Right on.


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