No Lodestar in Sight

It could be this or

360 at 9pm/169 at 10pm could be a goodie like this or

Bedtime 386 or 348, call it 360. 1 unit = minus 80 points. Bedtime target = 120. 360 – 120 = 240. Do math out loud Bubs double check. (Safety.) Sharpshooter aim 3 giant units. (Would be enough—inappropriately applied—kill person? Feels so.) And wait.

Wait because no Dexcom. Dexcom broke. Out of range all Christmas Day, not self-heal December 26th. Call tech support, explain previous static electricity problem & explain unbent paperclip in secret hole technique and representative then confirm mailing address and plan is FedEx overnight new one. New one scheduled arrive December 27th. Tomorrow. Other side of entire night.

Night so long w.o Dexcom. Starving baby bird (cheep cheep cheep!) plead: feed me, data, data! Without Dexcom only way get data (food, worms) is clamber out of bed (nest?) & see for self, like old times. Hour later. Pop strip can cap, click poke, squeeze, apply, pray, open eyes: 169.

something more ominous

something more ominous

Huh. Not sure good news/bad news. With no arrow, impossible read situation. Dexcom arrow is lodestar. Never had gut instinct until arrow came into life. Try calculate what arrow would be.

Determine points per minute: 360 – 169 = 191 points per hour/3+ points per minute—would be straight down arrow or maybe even double down arrows? Maybe should turn down basal or maybe maximum potency already happen? Try imagine would-be graph.

Think best course action = watch 1 – 2 more Breaking Bad & revisit in 46 or 92 minutes.

Someone comment Meri’s blog today, say pretty much chill out lady. Can’t help but to shake my head when I read this post. It’s not as bad as you make it appear to be. Maybe you need to hear this. I’m diabetic as well. Don’t drown in self pity. I think you give a wrong impression of the illness. Life’s not over. Be positive.

If worth reply/consider this (for Bigfoot) very agitating person can’t get out of head, maybe “be positive” for some is take care, but for other person take care looks like life is over? For Bigfoot “life is over” more like give up, not try hardest. Taking care is let’s kick diabetes in the nuts. Life is over is I give up I am too tired I have already seen all of Netflix and so you and your tender capillaries are on your own; I can not be expected to kick these nuts any longer.

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8 responses to “No Lodestar in Sight

  1. As someone I adore says: Your Diabetes May Vary. Every person who “has” diabetes has a different body, so to tell anyone else to be positive and chill out is to imply that all diabetes and how our bodies react is the same. Not true.
    When I was diagnosed, we didn’t have analogue insulin. Longer needles, nasty lancing devices, and it was crude.
    Now? I can’t imagine not having a Dexcom to give me data. The insulin I use is much more responsive – and much more dangerous.
    So, we are vigilant. Parents and PWDs all decide how to be positive and chill out – in their own way. And thank you and all the others who become human CGMs. You rock.

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  2. My brother and I just had a long conversation about my strategy for using the DexCom on my wedding day (i.e. where will I put the sensor, who will hold the device, etc.). After 20 minutes it both dawned on us that we’d lived without one for 17+ years, but we don’t know how. Neither of us want to go back to the dark ages. Pre-Dex were the days of 8% A1cs or higher. Can you live without it, yes; but our lives are better beyond compare by using it.

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    • Katy

      It would be kind of romantic if the groom held it in his jacket pocket. My groom held my chapstick. Husband = human purse?

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      • The plan is dad carries it in his pocket while he walks me down and then he will do a handoff to the groom. Meanwhile, my brother, who is a groomsmen, will have a pocket full of glucose tabs. It really is a family affair. =) p.s. my dress is too form fitting to create a secret pocket for the receiver like Kerri did with her insulin pump.

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  3. Katy

    va va va voom!

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  4. Kay T.

    Do I need to fire up my voodoo doll kit? Anyone who tells a T1D mom to chill out instead of cheering when she kicks diabetes in the nuts is spoiling for a voodoo doll transformation.

    Katy, you do a great job and with an exquisite sense of humor. Keep up the good work!

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  5. I made a comment to a neighbor about how diabetes is always on my mind. He told me I needed to get over that. What???? You can’t get over something that never takes a break, never rests. I have 2 to watch over (husband and son).
    I hope your new receiver came today and you don’t have to be the human CGM tonight!

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