Thursday, time for drive to TrialNet @Yale. Buckle into car.
Pause. Read email from Bubs’s endocrinologist:
Drive 2/3rds across giant state of Connecticut, listen David Sedaris read from diabetes with owls book, cracking up whole way, skip over super-inappropriate parts (men in cars drop trou) but relish essay w “freaky mothafocka” because Bigfoot think worth it for literature.
Finally arrive New Haven, Shake Shack.
After dinner, Jack clutch chest “Ahhg! My heart feels like it’s burning!”
BIGFOOT: Maybe it’s heartburn
JACK: It is?
BF: I don’t know–I’ve never had it. But if you feel like a burning in your heart? That’s probably what it is
Crap! That’s also one of the symptoms of celiac!
BF: Have you ever felt it before?
JACK: I guess, after I eat sometimes
Arrive hotel. Jack: “What it lacks in style it makes up for in space.” Unfathomable Joe/Jack live big beige apartment two weeks. (Photo not available. Imagine beige + big screen TVs. Man kicked out of home pre-divorce vibe.)
Morning of TrialNet. Meet whoa, wow, so nice endocrinologist leading study. Lots of time explain, make conversation Jack, no pressure. Rare meet super-genius of science nuanced interpersonal skill.
Begin OGTT: 96 mg/dL.
Jack drink medical grade fruit punch. Ahhg! This hurts! It hurts so much! Starts panting.
NURSE: Don’t throw up
STUDY ADMIN: Don’t throw up
NURSE: Don’t throw up. Take it slow. You have five minutes to finish the drink
ENDO: Don’t throw up. Think about something else
Jack: (panting like woman in labor, fast hooh-hooh-hooh) I’m okay
BIGFOOT: Do you want some water?
Nurse: I don’t want him to have any water until he gets the whole drink down. Take your time
JACK: (holds cup up to mouth)
STUDY ADMIN: Is he okay?
JACK: I’m okay. (Gritting through pain like war hero.) I’m savoring it
Heartburn? But then not celiac-related heartburn, because medical grade fruit punch certainly gluten free–no?
1-hour mark: 190.
2-hour mark: 150 or 170 or some other number high enough qualify abnormal but low enough not qualify diabetes = still candidate for drug trial.
After OGTT, ravenous. Nurse brings Froot Loops, carton of milk. Jack “This is my favorite junk cereal! And it’s the kind that comes in its own bowl!”
Then still hungry, lunch at Chipotle. Then heartburn.
JACK: I don’t think this is really heartburn. I just feel it after I eat sometimes, but I don’t feel like this all of the time.
Bigfoot plan bring Jack along Bubs’s pediatric gastroenterologist appointment Monday, see if can get double advice, schedule twin endoscopy, if not, just act casual. Oh, he just came along to give his brother moral support.
Tentatively schedule TrialNet drug trial begin October 21st. Yale still need official BG results from lab in Denver or University of Florida. Other fine person scheduled New Haven 10/21—seems like fate but Bigfoot still uncertain.
When drive home, stop @grocery store pick up dinner. Bigfoot pause long time bakery case, feel tears well up my poor children. Poor me! These beautiful cupcakes–oh! But then remember never, ever buy giant cupcakes anyway.