Some evening everything happen at once. This evening, Bigfoot spouse out for parent-teacher conferences, also Jack have literary magazine meeting, also Bubs agree get haircut, also friend return Miami yesterday have long hair son also hate haircuts, decide join kitchen counter hair salon since stylist friend already coming for Bubs’s hair.
Everything fine until literary magazine pick-up time, Bigfoot leave Bubs, Stylist Friend, Stylist Friend 2nd Grader in home for finish haircut. Miami friend with long hair son arrive as Bigfoot leave. Bigfoot drive to library, three minutes away. Pick up Jack and Stylist Friend older daughter. Stand around admire new publication, Sheepish Duck: Volume 4. Buckle into car. Get phone call: it Miami friend. Bubs at 44.
Miami friend perfectly calm (Rhode Island via San Francisco surfer via Pennsylvania deeply mellow), give all information: Bubs tested his blood sugar. He said he felt kind of weak. He got a 44. He took 4 glucose tabs. Should we do anything else? At that time Bigfoot realize: left Bubs with no adult informed of what do in emergency.
Bigfoot not mention glucagon pen, not mention call 911, not mention low blood sugar, glucose tab, where find Just Cherry juice/Swedish fish. Bigfoot not think of diabetes at all when leave pick up young literati at library. Bigfoot just leave. Remember bring dog. Remember pay for haircut. Remember return overdue excellent book Inzanesville (Jo Ann Beard). Remember peruse Friends of Library book sale. Remember pay $1 for The Paris Review Book for Planes, Trains, Elevators, and Waiting Rooms (Lucy Grealy, Lydia Davis in there—never be bored again.) Remember chat librarian friend about rich doofus put Frye boots in low-level consignment shop, just Bigfoot size. Diabetes not cross mind.
Shitty move, but result total Double Rainbow. When arrive home with Jack, Stylist older daughter, and seven copies literary magazine, Miami and Stylist friend describe Bubs suddenly stop playing in living room. Describe calmly walk over to medical kit in kitchen. Tell them, “I just need to test my blood sugar.” Describe Bubs facility with equipment. Tell them, “It’s 44. I’m going to take 4 glucose tabs.” After glucose, Bubs record time and blood sugar number in log book. Everything correct. Bubs fine.
Bubs ask Bigfoot, “Could I please have something to eat now?” Bigfoot say yes but not move, too absorbed in story of how Bubs handle 44 by self. Bigfoot stare at table. Bubs ask, “Could I have a rice cake with peanut butter and banana?” Bigfoot say yes. Continue stare at table. When look over at Bubs, Jack already slicing banana onto neatly spread peanut butter rice cake. Bubs remember test blood sugar again before eat: 106.
On way up to bed, Bubs marvel, “Is 44 the lowest blood sugar anyone in our family has ever had?” This impossible young, naive. Not know feel rage toward careless mother? Instead, happy set new record low.