Night before Jack confess I know I should feel sorry for Bubs, but I think I still want to go out with my friends. We’re kind of the same. He can’t eat candy because of his diabetes, and I can’t eat candy because of my braces. (Smile reveal black or orange bracket bumper on each tooth.)
Halloween Day start with surprise announcement: both boys, previously say want visit Seekonk Grand Prix decide want trick-or-treat. Bigfoot feel relief—probably it important (?) create traditional (?) childhood memory, especially (?) for diabetic, later write essay “How I Spent My First Halloween as a Diabetic: a Story of Creativity, Triumph, and Heart.”
It not important say how long Bubs sit floor of car behind driver seat, try bang head against door express rage about stupid candy holiday. Bigfoot think this some kind of something: first time see Bubs really scream and cry for diabetes reason, feel genuine sorry for self, real kid cry where get all red and wet and mucus-y, say over and over Let’s just pretend it’s a normal school day. Because I can’t…huh-huh-huh…celebrate Halloween anymore. Let’s just pretend….it’s….a…nor…..mal school day. Huh-huhhh-huuh…HUUHHHHHHHN. HUUUUUHHHHN then lose breath, calm down eventually going “huhhhhhn, huhhhhhn” until it become a pattern and then suddenly stop. Tell Bigfoot, “I’m sorry, I’m just so mad. It makes me want to say ‘D-A-M-M-N it’ and ‘son of a B-I-C-H,’ you know?”
Bigfoot try mention way celebrate Halloween without binge on candy: wear costume, be out at night with friends. He murmur only will be Jango Fett. One thing lead to another and one very generous 2nd grader loan Bubs Jango Fett costume complete with guns. Bubs over moon. Show deep respect for costume, decide shower before even try on. Wear this with long underwear and snowboard boots, totally turn day around. Bigfoot call 3rd grade friend say, Bubs decided at the last minute to go trick-or-treating after all. Could he go with you?
Now Bigfoot spouse and Bubs out in night with friends on street Bigfoot never notice. Jack out in night in unknown location, with some people know, some don’t know at all. Bigfoot home alone, eat many Baby Ruth miniature, feel sick. Allegedly hand candy out to t-or-t-ers, really just put bowl out on porch, not want admire clever/cute costume or apologize for dog.
Meanwhile, Dr. Doughnut still away, nurse away until tomorrow, Bubs still many high blood sugar, one over 300 at school today, feel sad Coro Center not have way respond unless have keto-mergency.
Earlier this week, find Wilfred Brimley Diabeetus mashups. Make us laugh so much.