13May / 2013

Diabetes Blog Week #1

In his hungover state, B really didn't want his picture taken.

Glamour Don’t: don’t have diabetes and eat rolls at Bertucci’s

Often our health care team only sees us for about 15 minutes several times a year, and they might not have a sense of what our lives are really like. Today, let’s pretend our medical team is reading our blogs. What do you wish they could see about your and/or your loved one’s daily life with diabetes? On the other hand, what do you hope they don’t see? (Thanks to Melissa Lee of Sweetly Voiced for this topic suggestion.)

Not matter if endocrinologist think Bigfoot smart, kind, wise, clever, pretty, all-around put together. But not able stop hope endo notice how very super-superior operation capable Bigfoot running over here. Current endo so gentle soul, cat hair on yoga pants, sends own appointment reminders instead of have secretary. Attitude-free person. No reason think endo judgmental, but Bigfoot always concern w. impress this nice woman. Ideally, publicly acknowledge Favorite Patient Parent of the Year—possibly small ceremony among New England medical elite, smattering applause, maybe honorary degree Harvard Medical School.

That why hope Endo day off from surveillance yesterday. It Mother’s Day.

Bigfoot kind of unorthodox Mother’s Day. Mother’s Day kick off week-long marathon of Forced Special Fun because same week wedding anniversary and birthday. So much pressure have fun. So for Mother’s Day wish instead of spend time family in motherhood tableau, ask Joe can you take them out for Jack’s honor roll celebration (know Jack always choose Bertucci’s Satantic Pizza & Dinner Rolls) while I go out to Garden Grille with the Famous Librarian? Wish granted. Kind of hurt Jack’s feelings but worth it for avoid The Diabetes Torture Chamber that is Bertucci’s.

Bigfoot free! Not contact Joe re how look up carbs on Bertucci’s web site. Not text remind disaster if eat rolls + carby meal, better try steer Bubs toward chicken. That how Bigfoot really let go. Eat beet latkes w. peanut harissa, tempeh tacos, steamed kale w. sunflower seeds gomashio, fiddlehead ferns, baby parsnips, raw chocolate. Briefly thought how many carbs beet latke but quickly put out of mind. Par-tay and yum.

Arrive home same time guys walk in. Immediate buzz kill. Joe enter w. large pizza box. That signal for ate so many rolls, unable eat pizza.

UH-OH MATH: if X goes out for pizza and comes home with the entire pizza, how many rolls did X’s diabetic child eat? ANSWER: X = despicably mellow.

JOE: He had so many carbs

BIGFOOT: Well, Bertucci’s. That’s why I didn’t want to go

JOE: No. I mean a lot of carbs

BFOOT: Like how many?

JOE: One hundred and sixty-two

BF: (displays double middle fingers)

JOE: It was just so easy to look up the carbs online. I didn’t even have to guess

Bigfoot look at notes. 10+ units bolus. Holy shit. Begin rant This is serious! This is your child! His eyeballs are going to shrivel up because of this. It’s like…child abuse. Or at least child neglect. This is so stupid.

JOE: The waiter kept bringing more rolls

BF: So you can tell the waiter to stop bringing them!

JOE: But Jack loves them so much. And it was 78 grams for the mac and cheese from the kids’ menu

BF: ?!?!?

JOE: I know!

BF: Well now we’re going to be up all night and I know you don’t care because you took the day off tomorrow, but that was supposed to be for our anniversary and now you’ll just be sleeping all day and who knows when you’ll ever be able to take the day off for our anniversary ever again? And he’ll feel shitty tomorrow and he won’t be able to concentrate at school, and then he’ll be embarrassed, and this whole thing just has a domino effect and you’ve probably ruined the entire week for our whole family!

JOE: I know

Probably carry on this dramatic vein few more paragraphs while Joe solemnly nod, all the while know when Bigfoot take Bubs Fro Yo World 100+g CHO “snack”, Joe never release peep of disapproval. Because Joe = saint? Or Joe = despicably mellow? Either way, Bigfoot know dramatic ranting not help win imaginary endocrinology award. Favorite Patient Parent award surely demand grace.

As predicted in my rant, Joe was up all night. However, no dried up eyeballs occurred.

As per my prescient rant, Joe was up all night. However, no dried up eyeballs occurred.

Bedtime check of the Dex reveal small spike, speedy recovery, current #150-ish w. arrow diagonally down. NBD. Then Bigfoot think Joe is so fucking lucky! He has the Midas touch! One big bolus and it all balances out. That never happens to me! Everything works out for him! Being the uptight one is really not paying off! Not say any this out loud.

Wake up 4AM. Joe sitting up, headphones on, engrossed in computer screen.

BIGFOOT: Why are you up?

JOE: Oh my god. He’s been over 300 for hours. It won’t go down. I just checked again. He’s down to 294.

BF: (picks up same rant from earlier, as if no time has passed ending with…) and now you’ve ruined our day, his day, and his health forever and everyone’s going to be grouchy tomorrow and this totally sucks!

The stretched-out view of poor Joe's night.

The stretched-out view of that poor Joe’s night. Stupid Bertucci’s.

Also threw in something re even if we rented that house in Tuscany with the chef, I wouldn’t let him eat that many carbs. And you did it at a chain restaurant in Warwick! Bigfoot kind of trouble with dropping it.

JOE: I know. I’m never going to Bertucci’s again. Does that house really come with a chef?

Bigfoot ramble off topic. Topic part is: don’t want medical team see Bigfoot complete dick. Want medical team see Bigfoot low-carb pancake flipping angel. Meanwhile, medical team priority = A1c < 7, hardness of thyroid gland, and no infection on pump site. Barely notice mother tap-dancing with spatula in angel costume.

Just stumbled across this from Jessica Apple re Joslin re high fat dinners.

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11May / 2013

The Entertainer

All rhubarb systems go.

Opening night! 4:30PM seem auspicious time rhubarb crisp: beautiful day, performance in evening, rhubarb crisp = Bubs’s favorite food, & 112/arrow diagonal down. Pre-show also ate low carb tortilla + black beans, farmer’s cheese, carrots.

About half an hour pp: where is my grammy? I am a rock star.

About half an hour pp: where’s my Grammy? I am a rock star. 122/ straight.

Before leave house for theater, quick check of Dex reveal who is superstar of rhubarb bolus.

Hour later: Bubs appear from backstage blackjack game, find Bigfoot auditorium. I feel low. Sigh. 65. Dex concur. Post Fun Dip hustle backstage for more blackjack. No re-check? Mom, I’m the DEALER. And it’s really fun. I kind of like the independence of it. Of being away from me? No. Of being a blackjack dealer.

It was blue Fun Dip—not a great choice before appearing on stage. On account of it turning the eater’s entire lower face region blue.

BIGFOOT: Take this extra Fun Dip with you

BUBS: Nah

BF: What if you feel low during the show? You don’t have to carry the meter. If you feel low again, just chug the Fun Dip. Or you can check the Dexcom, and then chug the Fun Dip

BUBS: Mom. No. Nuh-uhn

BF: What would you do if you felt low?

BUBS: I’d tell someone to get you

BF: During the show?

BUBS: (Shrugs)

Bigfoot give Fun Dip director’s assistant. Probably useless gesture.

Soon enough = showtime. See Bubs 2nd scene. Look like feel ok, but head down. Difficult discern well-being because role is act cool. Cool, aloof? Or verge of faint? Turn out looking down because little trouble (snag) pull comb out of jeans pocket for choreographed hair combing move. He was just trying to get the comb. He’s fine. <—It Bigfoot whisper spouse.

Show fantastic. One idea for improve.

instead of this ^ application of multi-media

Could try this ^. Something the whole audience could enjoy.

After show, Bigfoot tell Bubs so happy, so proud of, was it fun? Like perform with big audience? What best part?

Let’s not even play this game. Or let’s! The Fun Dip was too much OR the rhubarb crisp had a delayed punch OR the excitement of performing made cortisol course through his veins OR the excitement of being a blackjack dealer did it OR he’s getting sick OR the tubing got kinked during a costume change.

Wait at least five minutes before ask Did you look at the Dexcom at all during the show?

BUBS: Yup

BIGFOOT: Was it helpful?

BUBS: (Shrugs)

BFOOT: Did it get in your way at all?

BUBS: Nope

I think 4 Juicy Juices/1 night is our record

Arrive home, Bubs hungry and high, big bolus. Go 240-191-69-66 within one hour. Think that can’t feel good but Bubs seem OK with it. In morning, Bigfoot can see in notes Spouse up all night administering Juicy Juice.

WTF? Post-show high not require correction bolus some reason? Because not high from food, but high from stress? But what is high BG if not high blood glucose i.e. sugar—regardless what spur rise?

Meanwhile all night Dexcom in & out of function. Sensor Day 3. Just when think maybe better pull sensor/start over, sensor work again & accurate as all get out. Dang. Only make Bigfoot love more.

In morning, Bigfoot sleep late because migraine (irrelevant but pity always welcome)—causing pancake delay. Bubs wake up 122, then Minecraft happily while wait decrepit mother beat egg into pancake form.

This one means to illustrate the inadvertent basal testing, but maybe more illustrates the sensor spacing out on its job. CLUE TO THE SENSOR: He doesn’t wear you just because you’re cute.

This create inadvertent basal testing. Breakfast normal day = 7AM-ish/today 9:30AM. Climb 122 —>250 (250 on VerioIQ, 245 on Dex) interim. So perhaps make basal rate higher 5AM – 8AM? And breakfast I:C ratio lower–or higher–however describe less insulin per CHO. Clearly require further study.

OR maybe preferable just eat food at 7AM, keep same program.

we do 1tsp rms + 1-2tsp this stuff. he loves it he would probably like it plain. jack likes it too. I don't know how I feel about jack eating Splenda, but I think in B'a case it's probably for the best while we're in the pancakes (which is actually an egg) every day phase

Thank you, Type 2 house guest of friend, for leaving this behind on your recent visit. And thank you, friend, for passing it along. I never, ever would have tried it on my own.

Meanwhile, pancakes situation. Every, every day Bubs eat that eggcake. Love the eggcake. And also love this fake maple syrup. Currently mix 1 tsp. real maple syrup + 1-2 tsps. fake. Bubs adore. Would happily eat sans real maple component but Bigfoot afraid then pancake breakfast too low carb. Jack like fake syrup now too. Bigfoot not sure how feel about Jack eat Splenda, but think Bubs’s case probably for best.

Matinee now! C ya.

I wish I had seen this on Beta Buddies before opening night.

Someone should fold this.

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08May / 2013

Dress Rehearsal

8:03AM: the Klansman waves goodbye.

Spring semester roll toward summer with three performances end of week plus standardized science testing plus School of Rock, dentist, dilated eye exam, lacrosse, plus usual everything do; fingers crossed also hair/toe maintenance (Bigfoot only); plus friend/running partner moving away, need many lunch/dinner/beer dates. Also running dates.

Bubs not star show. Parent heart in throat regardless: feel miracle Bubs agreeable for wear jeans/wife-beater ensemble, perform choreographed moves, public singing. Shy, silly person apparently grow up/expand horizon.

Today first dress rehearsal. 4:45 – 7:30PM with instruction: eat dinner before rehearsal.

This looks much worse than it is. I mean, that's not his real skin, and the dark bits aren't coagulated blood.

This looks much worse than it is. I mean, that’s not his real skin (Flexifix!), and the dark bits aren’t coagulated blood. But it is totally hanging off. Yet still working with numbers that match VerioIQ. What?

Bigfoot plan real dinner (grilled meat/broccoli salad) for 7:30PM; requisite pre-dinner = pizza/Diet Coke en route @4:30PM. Dexcom 102 & straight, Verio IQ114. Under-bolus even though pizza because not sure what rehearsal mean for up/down BG.

4:46PM.

VerioIQ confirms it. BOOM. Players, this is with the Dexcom sensor hanging offa him, barely attached.

Arrive rehearsal. Zzt-zzt-zzt. LOW UNDER 80. Pffft.

2 Glucolift. Only 2 because pizza. Because under-bolus. And because pizza.

Half of a moment later. Two Glucolift in belly. Time to go backstage. Thus ends Dexcom coverage.

4:58PM. Two Glucolift in belly. Time to go backstage. Thus ends Dexcom coverage.

Zzt-zzt-zzt-zzt! LOW UNDER 55. This moment = Bubs presence required stage left. Because time for sing & dance of course. Mouth from seat in remote-enough for not embarrass auditorium section Do you feel low? Bubs mouth back I’m fine. Bigfoot not very worried, everything so new. Nothing bad ever happen stage performance entire family history. Like baby crawl into cute/wild hyena cage. All new. Curious.

There he goes. He was already doing his Cool Boys snaps. I’M FINE.

Dang. Stage left out of range Dexcom. Bigfoot turn on screen every few seconds anyway. Nothing. Maybe tiny bit more fear than hyena-cage baby.

At last see Bubs. Song & dance Cool Boys song. Not seem low. Seem OK dancer, no tipsy/sweaty/annoyed. After West Side Story + Bye, Bye Birdie songs, 6:30PM VerioIQ 299. That can’t be right. Your fingers must be Glucolifty. Wash hands 349. Hmm? Correction 2.25u (ISF 1:80; with idea drop 180 points, please.)

Wish could have seen dramatic climb via Dexcom! Sure would make fantastic hidden picture.

The incredibly good looking dancer who’s taller than the rest is B’s teacher. You can’t make this kind of person up.

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18Apr / 2013

SUPERFRESH

The remainder of this cartridge was Sprite.

High, high, high half day, whole day, another day too; three site changes: bubbles/kinks, and then…

The sensor/transmitter had torn away from its home adhesive. I tried to peek under there to see if the wire was still in place, but even if it were, a corset didn't seem worthwhile since it was Day 9

The sensor/transmitter had torn away from its home adhesive. I tried to peek under there to see if the wire was still in place; even if it were, rigging some kind of corset didn’t seem worthwhile since it was Day 9. The wrinkly, torn stuff is not human flesh. Gross! It is Flexifix.

Dex sensor day 9 so much ??? and crossed off martini glass & uncalled for 394 (= 290) etc., then see sensor has torn away from body through provided adhesive + IV prep cement + Opsite Flexifix overlay.

2.5 is where I think it is, right?

And so 2.5u correction via syringe (still a BFD), hover around 200, higher, higher then 4th site change and then.

Ahh. Everything better. New Dex sensor in place too. All tapes fresh, clean, smooth. In bed, 129. 120. Ahh. Was thinking nothing is ever going to be okay again but is okay. Everything okay. Ativan help.

Superfresh! 1) charged-up Dexcom, 2) freshly applied sensor, 3) fully loaded pump, 4) around back: brand new infusion site

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24Mar / 2013

Dexcom G4: Monkey Schlongs

Questions I’ll be researching tonight before I zzzzzzzzzzzzz

1. Dexcom work whilst charging? Dexcom battery prefer run down all way zero, then charge? Or just charge any time convenient? How fit Dexcom charge into Bigfoot active lifestyle?

2. Is?

3. Tomorrow school. Bubs keep Dexcom in pocket? In auxiliary Spibelt? Cram into same Spibelt as pump? Electrical interference pump/Dexcom issue? Ideally will obtain Flava Flav lanyard like D-Kid. And re nurse: ask nurse calibrate if Dexcom alarm but way off base?

4. What parent do/feel when arrow UP but already lots IOB? Maybe just silently to self okay, I know I know I’m doing a shitty job thank you very much.

After dinner: monkey schlong

Meanwhile…after dinner (20g CHO: chicken leg + apple + 2 mini peanut butter cups) take peek @Dexcom. Behold. 179, arrow up like excited monkey.

BUBS: Awwwrrrgh! Oh man, I’m going up!

BIGFOOT: You just ate. I think that’s normal

BUBS: Can I check? Can we see? Can I check into this?

BFOOT: Sure

That says 248.

VerioIQ report 248.

BUBS: Awwww! Oh nooo! (In weary tone) Let’s calibrate. (Sigh.)

Not sure why dejected. Not realize so often high? Maybe Bubs, like yesterday mother, thought Dexcom = never ever high again ever.

You said 179. I said no, 248. Now you say, okay…218. How did you settle on that figure?

Calibrate Dexcom. Enter 248. Dexcom recant 179; show 218. How decide? Why not whole hog–just told Dexcom 248 is correct answer. Unwilling admit error depth?

BFOOT: Can I test my blood sugar?

BUBS: Sure

Where this come from? Part is same old fantasy: Bigfoot get diabetes, figure out perfect-perfect perfect everything by experiment on self, save child, save world. Part is Bigfoot feel utter crud, think maybe high BG? Feel sluggish, tired. Other part is: meter accurate? Bigfoot result: 198.

BUBS: Mamma has diabetes! Mom, will you be okay? Oh, no. No no no! Poor mamma

BFOOT: If I have diabetes, I guess I’ll know how to take care of it

BUBS: But Mom, Mom, Mom! Oh no, I hope you don’t have diabetes!

BFOOT: It could just be the meter

BUBS: You better wash your hands. Remember you were touching those peanut butter cups?

Wash hands. 156. Ayayayay! High blood glucose for real! Make brain too dumb, body too lazy, feel like fall asleep face on kitchen counter. This trouble caused by kale soup + five Cadbury Mini-egg. Quick ask spouse hide remaining Cadbury.

Meanwhile. Bubs correction: 0.35u for 248. Not sure correct action. Pump recommend via EzBG, but no endo ever recommend test BG 1/2 hour after eat peanut butter cups.

Summary Day 3: Dexcom still amaze. But not know how best use information. Check it: you ate peanut butter cups and now you are high. <—How transform A (A = agog observe) into B (B = pro-active power moves).

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09Mar / 2013

Up & up

This is where I feel anxiety as well as an immobile lump of Irish soda bread with marmalade

The upper gut is where I feel anxiety as well as an immobile lump of Irish soda bread with marmalade.

Soon as think I’ve finally outgrown pimples! Zit. Soon as I made it through the winter without getting chunky! Irish soda bread season begin. Soon as notice He has ketones, but look at me handling it so calmly like a mother from a story. Freak out knot in stomach.

Two tens and a seven: 3 of the 7 kids we eat dinner with sometimes have March birthdays so we had cake. Singing, no candles.

Remind self deep breath. Remind self pause, locate physical space feel anxiety. Picture glowing energy ball bathe anxiety loving light. Not work. This Bigfoot story. (All dates on meter wrong bc never bother fix after February 29.)

#1 Yesterday Evening Poop Cake

Super talented friend create birthday cake w. realistic dog poops decoration. Bubs have medium-small piece but maybe bad SWAG g CHO b.c. later BG mayhem. Also ate: chicken satay/no sauce & 1/4c pad thai.

#2 After cake

Normal BG soon after eating cake. Good. But of course we will check again before we go to bed, just to confirm the awesomeness of our poop cake SWAG

Good job, Morons! Plan to check again before we go to bed, just to confirm the awesomeness of our poop cake SWAG

#3 High.

11:17PM. Correction bolus.

#4 Still high.

1:09AM. Change site/correction with syringe

#5 All better.

2:30AM Everything’s set. Joe finally goes to sleep. I think he watched Breaking Dawn II.

#6 Mommy, can you make me a pancake? Did you test yet? I’m 348! 148? No, 348! 48? No, 348.

The f? We know the insulin works, the new site works, he didn’t eat anything in bed, his hands are clean.

#7 Ketones: blood meter 0.7. That noteworthy but not very ketone. Pee strip proclaim: small.

#8 Correction with syringe. Pancake with insulin. Water. Last basketball game of season in 20 minutes.

#9 Higher. 397. You’re higher. I’m sorry! You don’t need to be sorry. I’m sorry. Do you feel like playing? Yeah, I feel fine! Okay, but all that insulin is probably about to start working so if you start to feel low, come right over to me even if you’re in the middle of a play. I feel fine! Are you sure you feel okay? Bye, Momma!

Just before the game

#10 After play one ten minute quarter, higher still: 446. You’re higher. I feel fine! Do you—I guess I could—can I check your (realize uncouth check bum site in crowded gymnasium)—I guess I’ll do another correction, but just be so so so so careful if you feel low please just stop playing. No, you know what, let’s go in the bathroom or out to the car and change your site. No, Momma, I’m fine. Please…I’m fine. Okay. Actually I feel kind of sick. Can you tell the coach I need to leave? I think I’m sick. I feel icky. I feel just like…ick.

#11 Tell coach. Walk out. Father who look just like Cam from Modern Family complete w. contrast shirt cuffs follow: you dropped something! It a dog poo bag. Dog poo bag…dog poo cake. Bigfoot say, “Oh, thanks! It’s a dog poo bag.” Cam II horrified. “It’s clean!” Why so much dog poo this story? Maybe a clue

#12 At home. Test ketones pee strip (bc. really just need to know if larger). Lovely peach melba shade of small-medium. Decide not change site, instead Dr. Bfoot prescribe play Minecraft one hour, post anxiety post, then test, then decide next thing.

#13 One Hour Later, i.e. Now

250, I never thought I’d say this, but you are gorgeous.

#14 Still want know w t f happen

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21Feb / 2013

WTF Mystery Theatre

It started with a bad swag on this ganache cake, made by young Jack. I used the 54g CHO I found on a random web site for one-twelfth of a random layer cake as my guide, even though our cake was in 16ths, because we eat our cake a la mode

It started with a bad swag on this ganache cake (cake made by young Jack). I used the 54g CHO I found on a random web site for one-twelfth of a random layer cake as my guide, even though our cake was in 16ths, because we eat our cake a la mode

Deep sleep. Phone ringing, ringing, ringing. Probably one of our parents calling to say another one of our parents is dead. Bigfoot parents more reserved—would wait until morning. Ringing, ringing, ringing. Gah! Let it go to voicemail! Must be one of Bigfoot Spouse’s parents. They should really wait to tell us until morning, because there’s nothing we can do about it.

BIGFOOT: What time is it?

BSPOUSE: Hmmm?

BIGFOOT: Your phone

BSPOUSE: Hmm?

BF: Your phone

BSPOUSE: (Rolls over, turns off phone)

BF: Why was it ringing like that weird kind of ring?

BSPOUSE: Hmmm?

BF: That different ring

BSPOUSE: Eyenaknow

BF: Was he low and it’s an alarm to wake you up?

BSP: Hmm?

BF: He was low again?

BSP: No, it was weird. I gave him half a unit

Now Bigfoot little bit awake for piece together situation, Spouse utterly unstirrable. Bed time: 76. Half a glass of milk. 10PM: 57 Must have over-bolused for the cake. 15g CHO Juicy Juice. 10:30 90-something. Good enough for me; I’m asleep. 12AM: 178 <—that courtesy BSpouse; must have been up cleaning after little dinner party, decide might as well check again before retire. 12:30AM 199 <—BSpouse again. Must have been worried #climbing? 0.45u. This bring story to 2AM phone ringing + Current Episode WTF Mystery Theatre. 300.

Was it

Miss Scarlett in the infusion site with a bloody clog?
Professor Plum in the liver with an organic glucagon response to the low?
Mrs. Peacock with a juice concentrate accident in the Juicy Juice juice box factory?
Colonel Mustard with a cannula kink?
Mrs. White with carby residue on the fingertip?

Get carried away with accuse Mrs. White, wipe finger alcohol, retest, during 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 forget other suspects: 306. Suggested correction: 1.35, Bigfoot dose 1.55 for luck. Then remember other characters.

Miss Scarlett: Check site. Can ascertain plugged in. Not wet. Visual exam by VerioIQ screen light reveal looks OK

Prof. Plum: Liver not Bigfoot purview

Mrs. P: It too farfetched

Col. Mustard: New site from 4PM, work fine all evening; wonder could subcutaneous kink occur at time other than during insertion/kachunk?

Wish remembered correction w. syringe option before correct w. pump in case Colonel Mustard. Now awake beyond lizard part of brain function. No way fall back to sleep after high level cognition (witness above). Cross fingers, check BG again 4AM.

Luckily, dinner guest offer Netflix stream suggestion for just such occasion: Horse Boy documentary autistic boy/adventuresome family travel Mongolia for ride horses & meet shamans.

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11Feb / 2013

Nemo + Mysterious Magic Marker Smell

NEMO

Don't cry for me. Joe did all of this D-work last night. Cry for me because I have a cold.

Don’t cry for me. Joe did all of this D-sleuthing last night. And actually you can cry for me, because I have a cold**.

Usually snow = low BG because ski/sled/general snow play. Blizzard Nemo = opposite problem.

Trapped inside, less active?
Bad site after bad site?
Room-temperature insulin too cold because power out; ergo bubbles?
Mother has cold; high BG = Bubs will have cold too?
So many kachunkers in trash. Maybe 2x/day. Maybe over-kachunking causing own set problems?

So far Bubs cheerful despite high, but not interested play outside. Now snow verging on rainy, very yuck.

Also yuck: lately reading smart, young D-people w. complications. Yuck. Hate. Pretty much put complications out of mind. Now scuttling back into front page part of mind.

Today power back on, so much Just Dance. So much. Eat oatmeal, bolus, please dance more.

Every Just Dance song feel like taunting love ballad diabetes; this peppy tune “she” = Bigfoot and “me” = The big D.

She’s got me dancin’
She’s got me dancin’
She’s got me dancin
And she’s always one step behind

Still like song though.

“Forget” You.

**It’s pretty serious: I didn’t even watch Downton Abbey last night. But I did see this, and really recommend it!

MAGIC MARKER SMELL

Meanwhile, just before blizzard, hustle Bubs into pediatrician because for past few nights, smell like magic markers but no ketones. Endocrinologist recommend visit pediatrician in case stomach bug. Pediatrician physician assistant listen belly, lungs, all normal. Check tonsils, normal.

PHYSICIAN’S ASSISTANT: Have you checked his sugar today?

BUBS: (looks at Bigfoot, perplexed. The time was 10AM)

BIGFOOT: Yes…

PA: What was it?

BIGFOOT: It was 140 when he got up this morning

BUBS: 141

PA: That’s great! Is it always so good? I mean 140, 141, that is fantastic! He has pretty good control, I can tell you that

BF: Well, you know, the number is always changing (knows it’s not appropriate/possible to educate the PA but can’t help herself from grasping for approval), but his last A1c was six point zero

PA: His what?

BF: His A1c (ashamed now for the brag)

PA: His hemoglobin A1c?

BF: (notes to self: find out about other kinds of A1c) Yes

PA: And that’s pretty good? Right? And with that 140 this morning, I’d say you have nothing to worry about. And the magic marker smell, do you smell it right now? Because I don’t smell anything

BF: No, I smell it more at night. And Joe can smell it, and Jack can smell it. It’s very apparent

PA: Well, if there’s anything to it, if it comes back, I mean I hate to send you back and forth like a ping ping ball, but I’d take the issue back to the endocrinologist, because it would definitely be something metabolic

???

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06Dec / 2012

Everything Wrong = NBD

I took this picture of myself fake-biting my nails to illustrate my anxiety. I’m really more of a cuticle biter/picker/pusher/ripper but that’s hard to get across in one iconic photo

Two wrongs not make right, but everything wrong maybe make.

7:30AM 95. Big morning bolus for normal oatmeal/maple syrup/milk breakfast: 6u.

8:30AM (It time drive school.) I’m hungry. That weird. Test: 350.

BIGFOOT: That’s weird. You’re super high. Could there be maple syrup on your fingers?

BUBS: (rubs fingertips to test for stickiness) I don’t think so. I think I…

BFOOT: Ooh. Did you enter the bolus for your breakfast?

BUBS: I don’t think so. I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!

BF: It’s my fault.

Explain I know you don’t like it when I hover over your pump, but we have to be more careful. (This not 1st time Bigfoot get too insulin-casual.) Bubs ashamed: I’m sorry! I’m an idiot! Etc. Bigfoot explain Bigfoot idiot. Then so wise, say “We’re not idiots, we’re just humans doing our best and this is how we learn.” (<–not actually say, but wish conjure equanimity for future.)

Eat small snack: one digestive biscuit. EzBG recommend 4.25u for 10g carbs (biscuit) + correction (hello). Bigfoot enter original 6u, because…wait, why do that again? Because think body not magically able metabolize carbs w/o full dose. But now think Bubs head for crash because insulin peak + carbs not line up correctly. Or think now…10g biscuit carbs not covered when already high…maybe should have been 7u. Or maybe should have been 4.25u as per EzBG, even though pump not know super blast oat/maple syrup carbs preparing emerge yonder belly.

Ugh. Drop off at school, Bubs cheerful, fine. Email nurse with could be high, could be low, very unlikely normal, yadda yadda, here what happen.

#1: I was imagining how angry I would be if someone other than me made this mistake; #2 is it insulting that I wasn’t positive she would know the expression TMI? Kind of like writing out id est, but then at least you’re making someone think you think they know Latin?

Meanwhile, notice not actually anxious. Know everything OK. Not fall into daydream/daymare of high BG dry out eyeball like raisin, not imagine glucose crystal rub artery like sandpaper. Not imagine ambulance blow past Bigfoot/emo dog while phone vibrate while get message ambulance for Bubs. Only imagine Bubs test snack time, correct high or low, or smile amazement if normal. Progress.

Meanwhile meanwhile, BG lately on good (wood knock) stretch, last night 4th consecutive sleep 6+ hours.

Breaking news!

OMG

But wait–there’s more!

This is real. Lucky, lucky day.

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27Nov / 2012

Two Not Medical Advice: Dessert First + Miracle (Maybe)Cheese

The miracle cheese:

Merry english muffin season.

New favored breakfast = english muffin (no panic–it whole wheat; wait, what? Still carbs?) + butter + honey (!) + obligatory milky black tea/stevia. This schoolday breakfast = superspike. So big spike, maybe make bad impression school nurse.

Data sample:

7AM 85, english muffin combo. 10:30AM 275.

7:30AM 90, english muffin combo. 10:30AM 231.

etc. every school day forever.

Today some science. Bigfoot ask Bubs eat cheese slice after english muffin combo. One slice provolone cheese. Result:

Just add cheese.

7AM 79, english muffin combo. 10:30AM 81. School nurse BG email take Bigfoot fucking breath away.

This not medical advice. Maybe always add cheese? Unless high cholesterol problem. Bigfoot, Bigfoot mother, sister, grandmother, both sons, all high HDL cholesterol. Maybe = natural cheese protection?

One other english muffin news. Grocery store notice “Light” whole wheat Thomas’s english muffin. Higher carb (26g CHO) than plain whole wheat Thomas’s english muffin (23g CHO)! This paradigm “Light” give Bigfoot gross Calorie King feeling, pleated pants, leather belt ostentatious mark for old waist size, waggle finger, “Carbs matter, but calories are king!”

Dessert, then homework, then play, then dinner, then NO dessert, then reading, then bed.

The dessert thing:

Realize/forget this over and over and over, but perhaps suckiest workaday part this adventure = high BG bedtime. Because high BG = correct, stay awake, see if lower, if not lower, correct, stay awake…etc. forever til magical hour 4:30AM.

So. If *certain* dessert going to happen, and in correct phase of realize/forget cycle, Bigfoot try make happen before dinner. Because even if belly full broccoli/tempeh/quinoa/chia/kale, sure able cram in dessert. So. Once dessert foregone conclusion, might as well eat dessert ASAP, give ample time work out kinks before mommy zombify.

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