Bad. Worse. Worst Possible.

Animas-Ping-in-Water-1

The Purple Happy Friends could represent almost anything. The fish tank definitely represents a toilet.

Toilet.

Even if poop there already, still room for pump. It gravity law. Help! My pump fell into the toilet and I can’t get it out because there’s poop in there! (I’ll get Daddy.) Moment later Daddy walk toward Bigfoot, pump on towel held in front, tubing still connected naked Bubs, three people stand stare at each other/pump in hall wonder what next.

Answer is 1) disconnect from child 2) alcohol swipes 3) wash hands 4) reconnect. EXTRA CREDIT: change tubing/moisturize.

(Also: yay Ping! <–When Blues Clues man Ping promotional video demonstrate waterproof, kiddie pool = euphemism for shit-filled toilet.)

Doubt.

photo

For calibrations: split the difference?

Love VerioIQ because headlight. But lately trip over many mentions VerioIQ legendary unreliable/reads high. Sort of with tone of “everyone already knows that this is a cool- looking meter but that it doesn’t actually work.” Then notice in own life so often VIQ way higher than Dex which—while perfectly appropriate blood meter few hops ahead interstitial fluid meter yadda yadda yadda—just make Bigfoot doubt veracity whole operation.

Dex display blood drop icon; calibration: DEX 112/VIQ 150. Enter 150. Then Dex 137. But kind of want tell Dex you know VIQ is exaggerating, right? I mean, that’s part of your algorithm, right? Maybe it Bigfoot job downgrade VIQ#—especially when calibrating.

Very unwise read Amazon reviews VIQ (notice no link) because quickly devolve into person saying tight control not matter, can attest because experimental chemotherapy drugs injected into his (plural body part) (periodicity) for (famous diabetes problem not cancer).

For now, Bigfoot hope VerioIQ not any more unreliable than any other meter, because approx. 1,000 test strips in closet.

Death.

Over course of past 19? months, Bigfoot slowly convinced T1D = huge hassle but not so, so scary. Today Riding On Insulin fundraiser email arrive w. theme Jesse Alswager. First time heard name. Google show 7th grader obituary, “died from Type 1 diabetes.” What/how? More google, online discussion, other D-parents so sorry ask, but wonder why dead, what #, what ketones, what-what-what. Then this:

“There is nothing to really tell you other than the autopsy really proved nothing. He bolused insulin at 11:00 am on a morning that felt like nothing different. He said he wasn’t feeling great and wanted to stay home. I figured it was because he and I had stayed up late and watched Kindergarten Cop laughing the night before. When his dad came to pick him up he found him slumped over his bathroom sink at 3:30. No time for a coma. No warnings. No vomiting from ketones. NO NOTHING.”

Bigfoot never hear of this. Not only not hear of healthy-fun-adorable Jesse Alswager until today, but also not hear of child just die no reason/no DKA/no hypo. Cardiac arrhythmia like ____ in bed or other thing or what? So so so so sad. Also so curious. Jesse Alswager’s mom JDRF activist/ROI Director of Development w. blog here.

Maybe nobody mention Mystery Deaths because nothing to do except feel terrible which proven 100% ineffective against death. Also maybe because anybody D or no-D could die Mystery Death, impossible prove T1D as cause? But. Oh. Jesse.

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14 responses to “Bad. Worse. Worst Possible.

  1. I say it all the time in class. Death is weird with a capital wtf. Live. Breathe. Love. Laugh at thingy in the poop. I am really enjoying a laugh at thingy in the poop!

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  2. Kay T.

    Erect mental gate against worst possible outcome “stuff” and focus on what you can control.

    Important things falling into toilets this week must be a theme. My +$200 bus pass fell out of my badge holder in the bathroom with the commode that infamously must be flushed holding the handle… Not a diabetic commode fish out, but a scramble never the less. Did I mention I had flushed before my bus pass decided for a swim??

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  3. Linda

    Ugh. So sorry.

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  4. Julia

    Not entirely true when they attribute death to cardiac arrhythmia. When the cardiac arrhythmia most likely is caused by, not a low, but a prolonged untreated low. On the death certificate, it is typical not to list the death as due to hypoglycemia….. because it can’t be proven as everyone’s blood sugar drops at death. Very beautiful child, unspeakably sad. Correction factors, basals, bolus insulin…. any one of these factors can change at the drop of a hat. My guess is his correction factor, previously correct, was too strong at that moment. Feeling sick…. maybe it was the start of a stomach virus. We need to fight for safer insulins before the cure. It could happen to any one of us but it still not the norm. We cannot focus on this aspect because otherwise we would be paralyzed with fear. Most of our children will live normal, healthy lives. Heaven has gained another angel.

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  5. I don’t know about this story, but as Julia said above, the forensic conclusion of hypoglycemia/diabetes-related-causes may not really be accurate. Not that knowing the reason makes it any more comforting, and it’s terribly sad that a child should die for any reason. (My younger son was born with a heart arrhythmia – had it for a day or two before it cleared on it’s own. I’m glad I didn’t know much about it or what it could lead to, or I would’ve been a wreck).

    But it goes to show you… you never know know when your number may come up. So we should always, without hesitation, plunge both our hands (elbow-deep) in that poop-filled bowl and put another chalk-mark next to “things I never thought I’d have the courage to do but did anyway”. Because no one wants to leave a potential life-event unfulfilled.

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  6. Got this in my email today. I’m on the FDA’s recall email list…thought of you http://www.fda.gov/MedicalDevices/Safety/ListofRecalls/ucm349127.htm

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  7. FUCK. I hate this post. (No offense, you know what I mean)

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