Up & up

This is where I feel anxiety as well as an immobile lump of Irish soda bread with marmalade

The upper gut is where I feel anxiety as well as an immobile lump of Irish soda bread with marmalade.

Soon as think I’ve finally outgrown pimples! Zit. Soon as I made it through the winter without getting chunky! Irish soda bread season begin. Soon as notice He has ketones, but look at me handling it so calmly like a mother from a story. Freak out knot in stomach.

Two tens and a seven

Two tens and a seven: 3 of the 7 kids we eat dinner with sometimes have March birthdays so we had cake. Singing, no candles.

Remind self deep breath. Remind self pause, locate physical space feel anxiety. Picture glowing energy ball bathe anxiety loving light. Not work. This Bigfoot story. (All dates on meter wrong bc never bother fix after February 29.)

#1 Yesterday Evening Poop Cake

Super talented friend create birthday cake w. realistic dog poops decoration. Bubs have medium-small piece but maybe bad SWAG g CHO b.c. later BG mayhem. Also ate: chicken satay/no sauce & 1/4c pad thai.

#2 After cake

Normal BG soon after eating cake. Good. But of course we will check again before we go to bed, just to confirm the awesomeness of our poop cake SWAG

Good job, Morons! Plan to check again before we go to bed, just to confirm the awesomeness of our poop cake SWAG

#3 High.

11:17PM 252. Correction bolus.

11:17PM. Correction bolus.

#4 Still high.

1:09AM Still high.

1:09AM. Change site/correction with syringe

#5 All better.

2:30AM Everything's set. Joe finally goes to sleep.

2:30AM Everything’s set. Joe finally goes to sleep. I think he watched Breaking Dawn II.

#6 Mommy, can you make me a pancake? Did you test yet? I’m 348! 148? No, 348! 48? No, 348.

The fuck?

The f? We know the insulin works, the new site works, he didn’t eat anything in bed, his hands are clean.

#7 Ketones: blood meter 0.7. That noteworthy but not very ketone. Pee strip proclaim: small.

#8 Correction with syringe. Pancake with insulin. Water. Last basketball game of season in 20 minutes.

#9 Higher. 397. You’re higher. I’m sorry! You don’t need to be sorry. I’m sorry. Do you feel like playing? Yeah, I feel fine! Okay, but all that insulin is probably about to start working so if you start to feel low, come right over to me even if you’re in the middle of a play. I feel fine! Are you sure you feel okay? Bye, Momma!

Just before the game: 397. Higher, but also quite soon after eating so maybe...

Just before the game

#10 After play one ten minute quarter, higher still: 446. You’re higher. I feel fine! Do you—I guess I could—can I check your (realize uncouth check bum site in crowded gymnasium)—I guess I’ll do another correction, but just be so so so so careful if you feel low please just stop playing. No, you know what, let’s go in the bathroom or out to the car and change your site. No, Momma, I’m fine. Please…I’m fine. Okay. Actually I feel kind of sick. Can you tell the coach I need to leave? I think I’m sick. I feel icky. I feel just like…ick.

#11 Tell coach. Walk out. Father who look just like Cam from Modern Family complete w. contrast shirt cuffs follow: you dropped something! It a dog poo bag. Dog poo bag…dog poo cake. Bigfoot say, “Oh, thanks! It’s a dog poo bag.” Cam II horrified. “It’s clean!” Why so much dog poo this story? Maybe a clue

#12 At home. Test ketones pee strip (bc. really just need to know if larger). Lovely peach melba shade of small-medium. Decide not change site, instead Dr. Bfoot prescribe play Minecraft one hour, post anxiety post, then test, then decide next thing.

#13 One Hour Later, i.e. Now


250, I never thought I’d say this, but you are gorgeous.

#14 Still want know w t f happen

12 responses to “Up & up

  1. Kay T.

    Just this morning I thought, is B finally in a good patch? WTH???? When does this poop get better?


  2. Mine craft is your mystery cure!


  3. Always sucks when you don’t know if the high is due to the site or the food, but better safe than sorry (like you were!)

    Poop cake — priceless!


    • thank you for liking the poop cake. i thought it was so funny! the birthday boys seemed to think it was just in poor taste. only one kid (a girl!) ate the poop part.


  4. I hate days like this. You do everything you think you know you should, but diabetes doesn’t spit out even close to the expected results. And all in the middle of situations that don’t make it easy to know what to do.

    Those highs making you want to rage bolus, but right before a basketball game negates the desire to rage bolus. But he can’t be feeling good with BG’s that high, which brings back the rage bolus feelings. Ugh. No winning combination there.

    I also wanted you to know that days like this happen to me too. Even after all these years, sometimes diabetes totally trips me out and I don’t know what to do. Days like that – it’s all I can do to just roll with the punches.


  5. This breaks my heart because I know so well what you are going through. Too many times to count. We were manually injecting and forcing son to drink liquids at about 3 am last night. This was after an insane ice hockey workout. It made zero sense. Took many years, but I finally (well, mostly) stopped trying to find an answer to every blood sugar abnormality. Take care.


    • Accepting the mysteries is very hard. For me. Because there IS ALWAYS a reason, right? Even if the reason is “a crazy undiscovered gall bladder thing happened” or “he had a dream he was flying” or “needs haircut” or a n y t h i n g


  6. we made dog poo christmas cookies for santa


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