Itch & Stomp

B

ubs low walk home. Half mile to go. I feel low.

No glucometer this short walk. Contents Bigfoot pocket: dog poo bag, phone. Bubs’s backpack contain emergency packs Mike and Ike. No meter.

BIGFOOT: Let’s bust out the Mike and Ikes!

BUBS: No way. I’m not going to eat before I test

BIGFOOT: If you feel low, you have to have sugar. Stop walking so I can get the Mike and Ikes out of your backpack

BUBS: No! What if I’m high?

BIGFOOT: We can fix that when we get home. But if you feel low, I’m sure you’re low

BUBS: No way. What if I’m like, a thousand, and the Mike and Ikes kill me?

BFOOT: It doesn’t work that way. You’d have to be high for a long time, and I know that you were 121 fifteen minutes ago, because Mrs. Nurse told me, so you definitely have insulin working in there, and you’re not going to die from eating candy no matter what

BUBS: I’m not?

BF: But if you’re low, that’s dangerous—especially since we’re walking. Just put a Mike and Ike in your mouth and then we can keep walking and I won’t keep talking about it

BUBS: No. And if you keep telling me to eat candy before I test, I will stop right here. Why are you always so mean to me?

This point Bigfoot pretty sure Hypoglycemic Ridiculous Personality Disorder take over. Consider options:

  • Tackle. Put Mike and Ike in mouth, clamp hand over mouth so no spit out (FUTILE)
  • Tackle. Wish for frosting tube. Chew up Mike and Ike in own mouth, mother bird masticated candy into unwilling child (GROSS)
  • Try walk faster while appease HRPD (STUPID?)
  • Put vision passing out child away in brain-attic drawer, attempt act normal (BEST BIGFOOT CAN DO)

Rest of walk home Bubs stomping boots My! Feet! Itch! (That some sign? Mean some hypo thing?) Then neck itch. Then back itch! Then almost home, Bubs stops walking, kicking big frozen snowbank in attempt scratch foot deep inside snow boot. (Bigfoot say come on! Bubs say Wait! I’m trying to scratch it!) Then one house away, almost home: neighbor pull out of driveway, new car Hiiii! We’re car twins now! That make Bigfoot feel must stop chat so not seem unhappy neighbor select same car.

BF: Oh, right! Ooh, but yours is such a pretty color

BUBS: (stomp, stomp, stomp)

NEIGHBOR: Is it?

BF: I love it! Well, I hope you love it!

NEIGHBOR: Better than the van (rolls eyes)

BF: (Shit! Now neighbor has maligned van, how can get away? Need kind word re old van or will insult neighbor.) I think this car still has plenty of room; I’ve never really had (trying here for tone to imply “the blessing of”) a van though. (Shut up shut up go home stop talking! Why can’t I stop talking?)

BUBS: (stomp, kick, stomp) Mom?

At last: home. Bubs I’m starting to feel dizzy. Bigfoot too. Wash hands, seem take forever realize not time for wash hands, time for poke dirty, cold hand. 5 (prepare for 20-something), 4 (close your eyes), 3 (squint), 2 (close), 1, open

60.

Orange juice.

72, 112.

Then post-hypo ravenosity: You know what I really want, even though it’s kind of breakfast-y? A PANCAKE. Wouldn’t that be so good? And after that a grilled cheese sandwich and a nice cup of hot cocoa. Doesn’t that sound like it would taste so good right now? And Mama, could I also please have one glass of water? Are you going to say no? I’m sorry. I’m just really hungry. So…how much carbs is that going to be?

Bigfoot pretty keen Daily Drop Cap dot com.

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31 responses to “Itch & Stomp

  1. What an adventure! It’s amazing how time can slow down and things can take FOR EVER when you are trying to rush to deal with a low. Marshall tells me all the time how things seem farther away and harder to find when there is the danger of a low blood sugar.

    Oh and, my feet get itchy when I’m going low and I am upright (standing, walking etc.) perhaps a little note to Bigfoot for the bank? :)

    I so enjoy the style that you write this blog in and sometimes, I admit, I want nothing more than to talk like Bigfoot when answering stupid questions or having a bad hypo/hyper day and dealing with people. :)

  2. g

    Loving Daily Drop Cap….yay for making it home AND for staying strong with unsettling neighbor situation! I hear my mom’s voice saying “copying is the highest form of flattery” it never made it better for me, but hope it does for you! :)

  3. what a challenge to deal with HRPD! you are a supermom – I probably would have been bullymom and had my kid by the elbow and totally not even heard/seen neighbor.
    will be using daily drop cap. fun!

  4. Thanks for the mention, Katy (I think).

    Kidding! Of course, makes me smile to see it here. Just wish it was something not so scary. :-)

  5. earthling

    Arggh! Oh! Feel so tired. Pfffft. Need sleep. Wish ok for 1 night, 4 BF and Bubs, Check in am.

  6. The HRPD stories are fascinating to me. I had no idea how irrational it makes people. I get it though. You found the great happy medium. Interesting that he didn’t want to eat before he tested even though he knows the signs of HRPD. Thank goodness school is close by. Your social anxiety makes me feel like a normal person. Bigfoot so brave.

  7. Katie

    I hate when time slows down like that! Always it’s when Joey looks at me with “that face”. The “I’m so low I could pass-out face”. Getting the supplies in order takes a ridiculous amount of time, I feel like its the first time I’ve ever taken his sugar.
    Let Bubs know that Joey has eaten first, tested second with no horrible consequences. I feel like you, if we put him too high I can fix it. Joey has never had HypoRPD, it’s always the opposite. Hyperglycemia makes him a totally unreasonable person, hypo usually just makes him spacey. Interesting about that foot-itch thing though!

    • i’ll talk to B about it when he’s himself—instead of waiting for the next hypo-moment. i will do it today. i was surprised that he thought he could die from high BG (i need to explain it’s the missing insulin that would kill him, right?)

      • Katie

        Hmm, tough one. Usually at this age I say “very sick”, but Joey is kind of a worry-wart and if I said death he would pass-out on the spot. Maybe you should focus on the “time” aspect. When you’re low it’s important to act quickly, where as it takes much more time, days even for BG to get so high you’re in big trouble. I’m pretty sure Joey was well over 400 for several days before the diagnosis. You’re doing the best job you can with what you’ve been handed. Keep trucking BF. Will you be at the CWD conference this year?

      • You’re obviously right about the D-word that ends in H!

        I am not 100% sure about CWD this year, but ima try.

  8. ktc

    you are a goddess, that’s all… it’s true.

  9. “Hypoglycemic Ridiculous Personality Disorder” . . . . is that a thing? Yeah, I don’t ever EVER have that. I’m sure Pete would 100% totally agree.

    Disclaimer: I am 100% totally lying in this comment.

    • Karen, I remember you describing it to me—how you feel, in the moment, certain that you are making perfect sense/justified in feeling tormented by someone’s lack of understanding.

  10. Love your writing style. Happy to have stumbled upon your blog. Will be back for sure.

  11. Sara

    I told people at work that if I am ever acting weird to just give me sugar. A low blood sugar is an emergency and a high blood sugar can be corrected eventually.

    • do they ever offer you sugar when you’re totally fine, and then you feel ever so slightly insulted?

      • yes! lows make me spacey. my hubs has been trying to learn the signs of my low blood sugars and i love him for that but he’s got to realize that every time i’m tired or quiet for more than three minutes at a stretch, it doesn’t mean i’m low! i’m glad he checks in anyways though :) love that man!
        also love checking in on your blog and hearing about bigfoot & bubs’ day!

  12. Amy

    Had hubby and T1 son read this one. Boy cackled at HRPD. Good story of a comrade he can empathize with plus a useful vocabulary lesson for his 13-year-old self. I am glad to have a name for that attic-drawer place.

  13. i imagined your ‘options’ paragraphs as if they were in a movie, all quickly edited together fantasy sequences, like in himym or maybe the dream sequences of ‘a christmas story’. i see that carey p has found your blog which makes me happy to see two people who bring me great joy through their writing doing the same with each other (oh god how creepy no one reads these comments down here right)

  14. Pingback: Poor Joe « Bigfoot Child Have Diabetes

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