SNACK ATTACK w/ best pseudo-recipe of 2012

Anatomy of a snack, with simulated pineapple bits and a 2nd bowl of soup.

After school Bubs test 82. Ravenous. Spot product “pineapple tidbits” Bigfoot audition raisin alternative for future oatmeal raisin cookie. Begin eat one, two, three. Oh my gosh mom these are so good and are they kind of good for me? (Not really, but they’d be good for a low. They are like candy.) But still! They’re really, really good. Oh wow, you know what I really want? An english muffin with peanut butter and Nutella, closed up like a sandwich. That would be so tasty. That would be so, so good. Doesn’t that sound good? Can I have half an apple–no, just an apple, a whole apple, while it’s toasting? Is that chicken noodle soup in that pot? Wait. I’ll have that. Wait. Can I have both? Wait, can I have the soup and the apple while you make the english muffin? And can I measure out some more of these pineapples? I wish we had milk. Is there milk? Wouldn’t it be so good to have a nice glass of cold milk right now?

80+g? CHO later…I’m done.

Chicken noodle soup barely recipe. But perfect for cook dislike touch meat PLUS too frugal throw away chicken. Often buy rotisserie chicken Whole Foods. Bubs only eat legs. Dog eat weird bits. Bigfoot spouse remove breast meat, Bigfoot make into soup. First time, try on Bubs. Like! Think so nice: no celery, no onion avoid. Then Jack interested. Like! Then Joe try. Joe kind of snobby. For example, if ask Joe “What kind of shaving cream did you want me to buy?” Answer just get the most expensive kind. Meanwhile, Joe wish eat this lowbrow soup every day. Crazy. True.

NO-TOUCH CHICKEN NOODLE SOUP

Or this soup.

Peel and slice two large (1/2 lb.) carrots into half moons. Put them in a pot with two Rapunzel (<–probably this brand bouillon is the key) bouillon squares, the breast meat from one rotisserie chicken (cut up into 1″ chunks, preferably by someone else), and water to cover (about 3 cups). Simmer until the carrots are tender and stir around to make sure those Rapunzel squares have dissolved. You could leave this simmering all day on a slow cooker, but that is completely unnecessary. Meanwhile, boil water in tea kettle. Measure out 14g maifun noodles (the microfine rice noodles that go into spring rolls) into each person’s soup bowl (14g maifun = 11g CHO) and pour boiling water over the noodles to cover. Allow to steep for about one minute, or until soft. It’s OK if they’re not all the way soft, because they will soften up more in the soup. Drain noodles. Return noodles to bowl. Top with a ladle or two of theĀ  chicken-carrot-bouillon soup. That is all. If you like brothier soup, obviously you would just add more water/Rapunzel.

This soup works well for lunch, cold remedy, whatever. Because it is so carroty, we call it 15g CHO per bowl, including the maifun.

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4 responses to “SNACK ATTACK w/ best pseudo-recipe of 2012

  1. I love that your husband didn’t even attempt to hide the snobbery of wanting the most expensive brand of shaving cream!!! My husband is the same way (wanting it) but he doesn’t come right out and say it like that, he uses more roundabout means…

  2. Linda

    Rapunzel bouillon!! The BEST!! When feeling small or sad I put a whole cube into a pint mug with boiling water, crush a big clove of garlic in, cuddle up in a blanket and sip it down. Tastes like love. Zero CHO

  3. you make me want to be the kind of person who cooks.

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