Porn for D-Moms

(there was a picture from porn for women here.)
From Porn for Women. No images from Porn for D-Moms available.

Chronicle Books may do well add new volume Porn for Women series. Cover photo Porn for D-Moms: bespectacled BrownUniversity endocrinologist extend toward viewer paper showing A1C score_____. (To be determined; focus group choose 6.9 vanilla fantasy/5.5 for hardcore.) Today Bigfoot starring role this quasi-erotic scene.

And he grew an inch, and gained 3 lbs. More free porn ideas for Chronicle!

Dr. Doughnut not say word, only hand paper with number. Important remember: naive Bigfoot anticipate A1C 10+.

BIGFOOT: 6.9?

DR. DOUGHNUT: Yep. Nothing wrong with that

BFOOT: How can his A1C be OK when he has been high so much?

DR. DNUT: He’s only high for isolated periods, then he comes right down

BFOOT: ??? (small tear of joy emerges)

Many women prefer written porn to visual. D-moms often prefer straight up numerical.

DD: Listen. This is excellent. Once you’re under 7, it’s all diminishing returns. Do you hear me? You know what I mean? (Slices line diagonally through the air with an open palm, fingers held tightly together.) It’s not linear. It’s curvilinear. In terms of long-term effects, a 6.9 is almost equivalent to a 6.1, get it? It’s getting down from 8 or 9 where you get the bang for your buck, do you know what I’m saying?

(there used to be a picture of a guy in betabrand’s disco pants here)
We may disagree on the best color for a FastClix, but every woman can agree on these pants.

More Porn for D-moms. Picture #2 Husband, poss. dressed in sequined pants: Why don’t you take the summer nights off, gorgeous? I don’t need to sleep for a few months. Picture #3 Restaurant Menu: Welcome to Pinky’s Organic Cafe, all carb counts verified by Atkins dieters with OCD. And Picture #4 FastClix display: Help Yourself! Kelly green, VW Bug Pop Orange, peony magenta…

*******

Is D-mom a generic term for the mothers of diabetic children, or does it usually refer specifically to D-mom on D-mom dot com? I meant to use it in a generic way, and didn’t at all mean to imply that the famous D-mom is getting kinky with her child’s endocrinology records.

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18 responses to “Porn for D-Moms

  1. It’s a generic term. Bogart it, pimp it, sew it with sequins, use it as you like.

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  2. Sara

    D-mom is generic – don’t worry. You are a d-mom.

    If you didn’t get your FastClix/Multiclix you will definitely be able to pick up one next week in the exhibit hall.

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  3. Sus3an

    Congratulations on the A1C. I was getting all jealous because I don’t think we’ll ever get to 6.9. But then I remembered that we just got a 7.2 last week. That’s close enough to 6.9 fo me, at least right now.

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  4. nicolep

    Can I just say, I totally heart you. Seriously. Heart you like crazy! This has to be one of my favorite posts I’ve read in a long time – and congrats, bigfoot and bug, on that a1c – thinking about how hard you worked at it (as we read in yesterday’s post) – it makes me smile that the number matched the effort this time… :)

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  5. Julia

    Congrats on the great A1c! And kudos to your endo for acknowledging what is normally possible with growing children…. they will never really be in “control,” they will have highs and lows, very erratic, but we can “manage” those…. get the lows up fast and the highs down as quickly. Eradicating the highs and lows so they don’t have them is a goal, but that has never been possible every day. It is only possible on days when there are no growth spurts, and when a host of other factors align or just plain dumb luck. I think a realistic view of what will usually happen prevents parents from blaming themselves when their child’s blood sugars do not always respond to the constant care and attention we are giving them. But long term I believe we can keep them healthy. As an adult, they will not have these strong growth hormones, they will be less effected by carbs and less insulin sensitive and as the caretaker of a teenager who has almost stopped growing, I can say that while there are still daily and weekly adjustments, it will get much easier. And easier, still, for a male child. You can keep him healthy until then. Great job!

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    • thank you for the good news, julia. that message was a cool drink of water! this probably isn’t the best place to ask but if i write it, maybe i’ll remember to investigate elsewhere: when growth hormones make the child insulin resistant does a HUGE dose work or does TRULY NOTHING work?

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  6. i clicked on the ‘porn’ tag and was disappointed. just sayin.

    thank you for sharing what dr. doughnut said about diminishing returns under 7.0. somehow i have never heard this, and it’s rather a big deal, don’t you think? wow. LEARNDING! THANK YOU!

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  7. rrr–when i googled it, i found a message board from a newbie saying how TERRIBLE it is to go over 120, and that every second we spend over 120 damages our eyes and organs, but she guesses as long as she never goes over 140 she’ll bravely try to stay calm. later on down the message board, it comes out that this is a type 2 person, possibly posting in the wrong zone. i didn’t need to see that. seeing that damaged my eyes!

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    • oh MAN. it’s true that things we hear/read in those early days can really impact us in ways we don’t even realize. UGH. too bad homegirl didn’t have enough sense to DISCLAIM herself as not a medical professional. :\

      Like

  8. Pingback: Without Further Ado… JUNE BBB « inDpendence

  9. Pingback: Best of the Best of the 'Betes Blogs - Moments of Wonderful | Moments of Wonderful

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