Bigfoot seek Dan Savage It Gets Better campaign for diabetic children (gay or not gay.) It get better? So far, not get better.
Every week need more, more, more insulin. Every week send chart of blood sugar number Dr. Doughnut, highlight high #s orange, low #s blue. Page look very orange. Bubs pause building cardboard/tape sculpture, proclaim Dr. Doughnut is going to be disappointed in me.
BFOOT + BFOOT SPOUSE: (in chorus) No! No she won’t. This isn’t your fault. You can’t control it.
BFOOT SPOUSE: You can only control how you feel about it.
BFOOT: (silently) The hell? Control a feeling—what does that even mean?
Next up, dinnertime: build custom burritos. Bubs choose black beans, tortilla. No cheese. No avocado. No slaw. No hot sauce. No sour cream. Bigfoot eyeball this meal. Very high carb. Maybe if sneak in more fat, slow down sugar spike? Too late, Bigfoot pour mango smoothie into glass. Bigfoot make smoothie, think Bubs not have enough fruit this day. Then have second thought and smoothie look like big glass of high blood sugar make Bubs go blind. Even worse: Bubs want 2nd burrito, just beans and tortilla. Consent to some cheese but it probably too late apply brake. This meal require 6u Humalog cover carbs at 1:20 + 1u correction for BS > 200. Math: that 7u! A huge shot. Used to be 1/2 unit for meal. Maybe 1 unit. Now 7. Whip through vial.
Bigfoot wish consult dietician, but remember Coro Center dietician team think corn a vegetable. Maybe rub lantern, genie version Dr. Weil come out. Embrace Bigfoot, smell of very advanced variety patchouli, hand Bubs shitaake mushroom and administer accupuncture, cure diabetes, vanish.
Best diet advice so far, eat cinnamon. Share news with Bubs. Bubs love cinnamon. Brainstorm meal: I should have cinnamon buns! And sticky buns! And that cinnamon bread we have for Christmas!
Twisted part Bigfoot enjoying fact insulin pump cost $8000. $8000! This week choose brand. Probably Bubs choose whichever look most like Star Wars ship.